| The Association of Retired People
Questions and Answers from a recent Forum |
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| Q:Â Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them? | A:Â Try a bookstore, under Fiction. |
| Q:Â What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? | A:Â Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you’re done, you will have a place to live. |
| Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible… Is that true? Where can it be found? |
A:Â Yes. Matthew 14:92:Â “And Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Egypt…” |
| Q:Â How can you increase the heart rate of your over-70 year-old husband? | A:Â Tell him you’re pregnant. |
| Q:Â How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles? | A:Â Take off your glasses. |
| Q:Â Seriously! What can I do for these crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face? | A:Â Go braless. It will usually pull them out.. |
| Q:Â Why should 70 plus year old people use valet parking? | A:Â Valets don’t forget where they park your car. |
| Q:Â Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? | A:Â Storing memory is not a problem; retrieving it is the problem. |
| Q:Â As people age, do they sleep more soundly? | A:Â Yes, but usually in the afternoon. |
| Q:Â Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye glasses? | A:Â On their foreheads. |
| Q:Â What is the most common remark made by 70-plus year olds when they enter antique stores? | A:Â “Gosh, I remember these!” |
| SMILE, You’ve still got your sense of humor! | |