Men compared to women

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.

Q: Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
A: Because a woman who canâ€t even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: Itâ€s one of those ‘evolutionary things†that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
A: When she starts a sentence with “A man once told me…”

Q: How do you fix a womanâ€s watch?
A: You donâ€t. There is a clock on the oven.

Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. Heâ€ll shut up once you let him in.

Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.

Q: When will women will be equal to men?
A: When they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

Fact: In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Fact: I married a Miss Right. I just didnâ€t know her first name was Always.

Fact: Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a womanâ€s sex drive by 90%. Itâ€s called a Wedding Cake.

and that’s when the fight started…