Jul
31
| The Association of Retired People
Questions and Answers from a recent Forum |
|
| Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them? | A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction. |
| Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? | A: Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you’re done, you will have a place to live. |
| Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible… Is that true? Where can it be found? |
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92: “And Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Egypt…” |
| Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-70 year-old husband? | A: Tell him you’re pregnant. |
| Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles? | A: Take off your glasses. |
| Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face? | A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.. |
| Q: Why should 70 plus year old people use valet parking? | A: Valets don’t forget where they park your car. |
| Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? | A: Storing memory is not a problem; retrieving it is the problem. |
| Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly? | A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon. |
| Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye glasses? | A: On their foreheads. |
| Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus year olds when they enter antique stores? | A: “Gosh, I remember these!” |
| SMILE, You’ve still got your sense of humor! | |
Tags: humor for seniors, old age humour, s