After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another man on her
nightstand by the bed.
He begins to worry……….. “Is this your husband?”he nervously asks.
“No, silly,” she replies, snuggling up to him.
“Your boyfriend, then?” he continues.
“No, not at all,” she says, nibbling away at his ear.
“Is it your dad or your brother?” he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
“No, no, no! You are so hot when you’re jealous!” she answers.
“Well, who in the hell is he, then?” he demands.
“That’s me before the surgery!”
A little boy goes to his father and asks “Daddy, how was I born?”
The father answers, “Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!Â
Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.Â
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.Â
We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive.Â
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little pop-up appeared that said:Â
….Â
(scroll down to read)Â
….Â
….Â
….Â
….Â
….Â
….Â
“You Got Male!
An elderly gent was invited to an old friend’s home for dinner one evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love. While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over to his host, “I think it’s wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names.” The old man hung his head. “I have to tell you the truth,” he said, “Her name slipped my mind about 10 years ago, and I’m scared to death to ask the cranky old bitch what it is.”
Confucius Says:
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who run in
Front of car get tired.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who run behind
Car get exhausted.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man with one
Chopstick go hungry.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who scratch butt
Should not bite fingernails.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who eat many
Prunes get good run for money..
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Baseball is wrong:
Man with four balls cannot walk.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
War does not
Determine who is right, war determine who is
Left.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Wife who put
Husband in doghouse soon find him in
Cathouse..
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who fight with
Wife all day get no piece at night.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It take many nails
To build crib, but one screw to fill it.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who drive like
Hell, bound to get there.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who live in
Glass house should change clothes in
Basement.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Man who fish in
Other man’s well often catch crabs.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Crowded elevator
Smell different to midget.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Person who deletes this has no humor!!!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Now send it to 1
Or more people.
Nothing will
Happen but 1 or more people laughing due to these
FUNNY EMAILS
|
May peace break into your home and may thieves come to steal your debts.
of your life!!! |
|
Seasons Greetings |
WISHINGÂ YOU -Â INÂ YOURÂ BUSY
LIFESTYLE – SOME TIME FOR
RELAXATION AND REFLECTION.
GOOD SLEEP
GOOD HEALTH & EXCERCISE
SOMEONE TO DANCE WITH
A BIT OF ADVENTURE
GOOD LOOKS
BUT MOST OF ALL…
I WISH YOU LOTS OF BEAR HUGS!
AND THE BLISS OF REAL LOVE!
BUT WATCH OUT FOR THOSE
BLOODY PENGUINS!
