I think I’ll pass on saving gas, I’d rather save my a…!
The Olympic torch relay just got bigger, much bigger.
At 106 days, the pre-Vancouver Winter Games run weighs in as the longest domestic relay in Olympic history and to help get it across the finish line … Arnie is back.
Arnold Schwarzenegger, now Governor of California, will be in  Canada to flex his pecs with a torch run through Vancouver’s famous Stanley Park.
The former Mr Universe and Mr Olympia champion, now 62, will carry the torch  on Saturday, just before the Games (February 13-29) open that evening.
With eyes on Sochi
For Russia, the Vancouver games are special: Sochi is next in line, becoming in 2014 the first Russian city to host the Winter Olympics. Preparations are in full swing, including an examination of predecessors’ experience.
Children celebrate the arrival of the Vancouver 2010 Olympic torch to Whistler, British Columbia
“I’m very optimistic,” Jacques Rogge, president of the International Olympic Committee, said last week when asked about prospects for the success of these Games. “I’m very confident.”
The 2010 Winter Olympics will begin Friday in Vancouver with the opening ceremonies, the first to be held indoors.
Like Canada and its people, these Games figure to be efficient, friendly, and sensible.
Vancouver will be the largest and warmest city ever to host a Winter Olympics and, nestled between the Pacific and the Rockies, one of the most naturally alluring.
Can’t wait!!!!!
Little Johnny’s mother asked him, “How did you get that bruise on your arm?”
Little Johnny replied, “I ate some Easter candy.”
“Eating Easter candy won’t give you a bruise.”
“It will if it’s your big brother’s candy!”
Whistler, which will host the vast majority of outdoor events, towers at over 7,000 ft above sea level and currently has no problem with its snow.
In Cypress Mountain, however, which will host freestyle skiing and snowboard, there is definitely a problem, and trucks have been sent in to collect snow from nearby Manning Park and make sure .
there are no red faces when the winter Games come around.
Three stupid guys just died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first man, “WHAT IS EASTER?” The man replies, “Oh, that’s easy, it’s the holiday in November when everybody gets together, eats turkey, and is thankful…”
“WRONG,” replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second man the same question, “WHAT IS EASTER?”
The second man replies, “No, Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus.”
St. Peter looks at the second man, shakes his head in disgust, looks at the third man and asks, “WHAT IS EASTER?”
The third man smiles and looks St. Pete in the eye.
“I know what Easter is. Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and He was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took Him to be crucified and was stabbed in the side, made Him wear a crown of thorns, and He was hung on a cross. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder. Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out, and if He sees his shadow there will be six more weeks of winter.”
On Easter morn at early dawn
before the cocks were crowing,
I met a bob-tail bunnykin
and asked where he was going.
“Tis in the house and out the house
a-tipsy, tipsy-toeing,
‘Tis round the house and ‘bout the house
a lightly I am going.”
“But what is that of every hue
you carry in your basket?”
“Tis eggs of gold and eggs of blue;
I wonder that you ask it.
“Tis chocolate eggs and bonbon eggs
and eggs of red and gray,
For every child in every house
on bunny Easter Day.”
He perked his ears and winked his eye
and twitched his little nose;
He shook his tail -what tail he had
and stood up on his toes.
“I must be gone before the sun;
the east is growing gray;
“Tis almost time for bells to chime.”
So he hippety-hopped away.
Written by: Rowena Bennett, 1930
10. Big tax write-off.
9. Who ever heard of Easter Bricks?
8. Consider all of the varieties: scrambled, over easy, hard boiled.
7. He gets a good deal from the local chickens.
6. Secret plan to eliminate human race by cholesterol overdose.
5. Pressure from the Egg Marketing Board.
4. Because if it brought bottle rockets it would be the Independence Bunny.
3. Would you want to hunt for waffles?
2. He thinks guys should get chicks at least once a year.
1. Because the Energizer rabbit got the good job.
