BP Says That Oil Flow Has Stopped as Cap Is Tested
“I am very excited that there’s no oil in the Gulf of Mexico,†Kent Wells, a senior vice president for BP, said about the flow during a teleconference on Thursday, “but we just started the test and I don’t want to create a false sense of excitement.â€
My wife and I operate an expanding business and we needed to hire a new employee. I through this application in the garbage. My wife (without me knowing) replied to Bryan!
****************
To hoom it mae cunsern,
I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.
I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..
I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.
I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,
I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.
hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.
Sinseerly,
BRYAN
PS : Because my resimay is a bit short – below is a pickture of me.
My wife’s response:
Dear Bryan ,
It’s OK honey, we’ve got spell check.
See you Monday.
AND THAT’S WHEN THE FIGHT STARTED…
Maxine and I operate a small but growing business and we needed to hire a new employee. I threw this application in the garbage. Maxine (without me knowing) replied to Bryan!
****************
To hoom it mae cunsern,
I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.
I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..
I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.
I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,
I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.
hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.
Sinseerly,
BRYAN
PS : Because my resimay is a bit short – below is a pickture of me.
Maxine’s response:
Dear Bryan ,
It’s OK honey, we’ve got spell check.
See you Monday.
Maxine
AND THAT’S WHEN THE FIGHT STARTED…
What does she see in Bryan? I bet he doesn’t even drink beer!
I think this a great song! The lyrics are outstanding!
Ooohh New York x2
Grew up in a town that is famous as the place of movie scenes
Noise was always loud, there are sirens all around and the streets are mean
If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere, that’s what they say
Seeing my face in lights or my name on marquees found down on Broadway
Even if it ain’t all it seems, I got a pocketful of dreams
Baby, I’m from New York
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There’s nothing you can’t do
Now you’re in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Hear it for New York, New York, New York!
On the avenue, there ain’t never a curfew, ladies work so hard
Such a melting pot, on the corner selling rock, preachers pray to God
Hail a gypsy cab, takes me down from Harlem to the Brooklyn Bridge
Some will sleep tonight with a hunger far more than an empty fridge
I’m gonna make it by any means, I got a pocketful of dreams
Baby, I’m from New York
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There’s nothing you can’t do
Now you’re in New York
These street will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Hear it for New York, New York, New York!
One hand in the air for the big city,
Street lights, big dreams all looking pretty
No place in the world that can compare
Put your lighters in the air, everybody say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
In New York
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There’s nothing you can’t do
http://www.elyricsworld.com/empire_state_of_mind_(part_ii)_lyrics_alicia_keys.html
Now you’re in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Now you’re in New York!
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There’s nothing you can’t do
Now you’re in New York
These street will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Hear it for New York!
Keys’ debut album, Songs in A Minor, was a commercial success, selling over 12 million copies worldwide. She became the best-selling new artist and best-selling R&B artist of 2001. The album earned Keys five Grammy Awards in 2002, including Best New Artist and Song of the Year for “Fallin’“. Her second studio album, The Diary of Alicia Keys, was released in 2003 and was also another success worldwide, selling eight million copies. The album garnered her an additional four Grammy Awards in 2005. Later that year, she released her first live album, Unplugged, which debuted at number one in the United States. She became the first female to have an MTV Unplugged album to debut at number one and the highest since Nirvana in 1994.
Keys made guest appearances on several television series in the following years, beginning with Charmed. She made her film debut in Smokin’ Aces and went on to appear in The Nanny Diaries in 2007. Her third studio album, As I Am, was released in the same year and sold six million copies worldwide, earning Keys an additional three Grammy Awards. The following year, she appeared in The Secret Life of Bees, which earned her a nomination at the NAACP Image Awards. She released her fourth album, The Element of Freedom, in December 2009, which became Keys’ first chart-topping album in the United Kingdom. Throughout her career, Keys has wonnumerous awards and has sold over 30 million albums worldwide. Billboard magazine named her the top R&B artist of the 2000–2009 decade, establishing herself as one of the best-selling artists of her time.
1. Just loved these songs! Great memories from the 2010 World Cup in South Africa!
Shakir – Waka Waka, This time for Africa
K’naan – Wavin’ Flag
2. Damn Vuvuzelas
3. Beautiful Sexy Fans
I couldn’t understand what FIFA had against the fans in Orange. I love that colour!
4. Diego Maradona -What a character!
5. England, France, and Italy being eliminated.
6. World Cup Jokes
You heard about the England bra?
All support, no cup.
What’s the differnce between a cup of coffee and England? Coffee stays in the cup longer.
Argentina are playing England in the world cup, and Messi says to the team, “listen you all seem tired, why don’t you have a night off, have a drink and I’ll play by myself.†So they agree and Messi goes to play England by himself.
At half time the Argentinian team check the score and they see ARG 1-0 ENG (Messi 37th min). They’re all impressed and get back to what theyre doing.
After the match finishes they check the score and see ARG 1-1 ENG (Lampard 85th min). They go to their dressing room and see Messi with his head in his hands. They tell him, “Come on, cheer up you got a draw all by yourself, that’s great.â€Messi replies, “No you don’t understand, I got sent off in the 60th minute.â€
John Terry reckons the players missed their friends and family… remind me again what he does with his friend’s family?
John Terry is so traumatized he won’t be able to sleep with a teammate’s wife for WEEKS.
In a class, the teacher is asking everyone what jobs their parents have…
Teacher to kid: and what does your dad do?
Jimmy: he’s a stripper in a gay bar and often lets other men touch his privates
After class, teacher takes Jimmy to one side…
Teacher: is that true about your dad?
Jimmy: no, he plays football for england but I was too embarassed to say.
I can’t believe we only managed a draw against a poor team we should easily have beaten.
I’m ashamed to call myself Algerian.
Woman in Distress at the World Cup
My wife and I had great seats for a 2010 World Cup match. I noticed a fan in distress and I got up to help her. My wife asked, “Where are you going?’
I answered, “I think she lost her cell phone and I have a good idea where it is.â€
and that’s when the fight started…
7. Robert Green Jokes, Poor Guy!
Steven Gerard said that “The whole team is behind Robert Green.(the English goalkeeper who scored a goal in his own net)†His problem was that too many balls were getting behind him as well!
Robert Green is a man who makes his goals. Unfortunately for him, some are for the other team!
The English needed an experienced goalkeeper. Instead, they got one who was Green.
Robert Green was told to keep his eyes on the ball. Too bad he couldn’t keep his hands on it as well!
8. The inability of the FIFA Executive to use modern technolgy.
The whole world knew England scored, except for the only person that matters – the ref!
No argument!
9. The Passion of the fans and commentators
Spanish commentator celebrates goal by convulsing celebración de Camacho gol de Villa a Paraguay 2010
10. Â Great 2010 World Cup Commercials
Very Sexy Prestige Beer’s World Cup 2010 TV Ad Brazil Argentina
Animals Playing Soccer (World Cup South Africa 2010) Futbol (football)
“Hello, Senor Rod?” Â Â This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country
house.”
“Ah yes, Ernesto. Â What can I do for you? Â Is there a problem?”
“Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot – he
is dead.”
“My parrot? Â Dead? Â The one that won the International competition?”
“Si, Senor, that’s the one.”
“Damn! Â That’s a pity! Â I spent a small fortune on that bird. Â What did
he die from?”
“From eating the rotten meat, Senor Rod.
“”Rotten meat? Â Who the hell fed him rotten meat?”
“Nobody, Senor. Â He ate the meat of the dead horse.”
“Dead horse? Â What dead horse?”
“The thoroughbred, Senor Rod.”
“My prize thoroughbred is dead?”
“Yes, Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart.”
“Are you insane?? Â What water cart?”
“The one we used to put out the fire, Senor.”
“Good Lord!! Â What fire are you talking about, man??”
“The one that destroyed your house, Senor! Â A candle fell and the
curtains caught on fire.”
“What the hell?? Â Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of
a candle??!!”
“Yes, Senor Rod.”
“But there’s electricity at the house!! Â Â What was the candle for?”
“For the funeral, Senor Rod.”
“WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!”
“Your wife’s, Senor Rod. Â She showed up very late one night and I
thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Taylor Made Super
Quad 460 golf club.”
SILENCE……….. LONG SILENCE………
“Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you’re in deep shit!!”
A married couple are shopping in their local supermarket. The husband picks
up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. “What do you think you’re
doing?” asks the wife.
“They’re on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,” he replies.
“Put them back! We can’t afford them,” orders the wife.
They carry on shopping.
A few aisles farther on the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts
it in the basket.
“What do you think you’re doing?” asks the husband.
“Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,” replies the wife.
Her husband retorts, “So does 24 cans of Budweiser, and it’s half the price.”
A married couple are shopping in their local supermarket. The husband picks
up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. “What do you think you’re
doing?” asks the wife.
“They’re on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,” he replies.
“Put them back! We can’t afford them,” orders the wife.
They carry on shopping.
A few aisles farther on the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts
it in the basket.
“What do you think you’re doing?” asks the husband.
“Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,” replies the wife.
Her husband retorts, “So does 24 cans of Budweiser, and it’s half the price.”
South Africa to bid for 2020 Olympics But what about Vuvuzelas?
After successfully hosting Africa’s first World Cup, South Africa will attempt to land the continent’s first Olympics, too.
However, the Vuvuzela may not be welcomed at the games.
While visiting South Africa during the 2010 World Cup, London Mayor Boris Johnson made it clear that he doesn’t want the horns to catch on back home.
“I’m not convinced that we are going to need an Olympic vuvuzela,” Johnson said  “It’s a wonderful thing. It’s a beautiful instrument. It’s very easy to master, but I don’t think we’ll necessarily be issuing them to the crowds.”
“I’m very impressed with the vuvuzelas and,” but he added, “we’re thinking of not having them.
Vuvuzelas were not allowed at the 2010 Wimbledon Tennis Championships
“Out of courtesy to the players and their fellow spectators, we make a point of asking spectators not to bring items which could either cause a distraction or interfere with the enjoyment of the occasion,†All England Club chief executive Ian Ritchie said in a statement Thursday.
“Rattles, klaxons and vuvuzelas all fall into that category and they will not be allowed into the grounds. Our message is do not bring them in the first place.â€
England still upset over World Cup Performance, or lack of…
After successfully hosting Africa’s first World Cup, South Africa will attempt to land the continent’s first Olympics, too.
However, the Vuvuzela may not be welcomed at the games.
While visiting South Africa during the 2010 World Cup, London Mayor Boris Johnson made it clear that he doesn’t want the horns to catch on back home.
“I’m not convinced that we are going to need an Olympic vuvuzela,” Johnson said  “It’s a wonderful thing. It’s a beautiful instrument. It’s very easy to master, but I don’t think we’ll necessarily be issuing them to the crowds.”
“I’m very impressed with the vuvuzelas and,” but he added, “we’re thinking of not having them.
Vuvuzelas were not allowed at the 2010 Wimbledon Tennis Championships
“Out of courtesy to the players and their fellow spectators, we make a point of asking spectators not to bring items which could either cause a distraction or interfere with the enjoyment of the occasion,†All England Club chief executive Ian Ritchie said in a statement Thursday.
“Rattles, klaxons and vuvuzelas all fall into that category and they will not be allowed into the grounds. Our message is do not bring them in the first place.†England still upset over World Cup Performance, or lack of…
