Subject: Manure
Wonder why my teachers never taught this?
Manure: Â In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be
transported by ship and it was also before commercial fertilizer ‘s
invention, so large shipments of manure were common.
It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than
when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier,
but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by product is
methane gas.
As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could
(and did) happen.
Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came
below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
just what was happening.
After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term
‘ Ship High In Transit ‘ on them, which meant for the sailors to stow
it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into
the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production
of methane.
Thus evolved the term ‘ S.H.I.T ‘, (Ship High In Transit) which has
come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
You probably did not know the true history of this word.
Neither did I.
I had always thought it was a golf term!
Interesting that the people taking the movie seem to just leave!!!!
The Collingwood Elvis Festival has grown to become the Largest Elvis Festival In the World.
Who would have thunk it?
WELCOME HOME ELVIS
Numerous venues
Large crowds
Fun for all Ages
Midway and rides
Hundreds of Vendors
Great times for all
People Watching is a Highlight
CROWNING OF THE KING
Saturday, July 24, 2010, 8pm – 11:30pm featuring our 2009 Champions Thane Dunn and Chris Ayotte, in addition to an impressive roster of other Collingwood Past Champions. An independent “one night only†head to head competition of our Professional Collingwood Champions to see who will reign the overall Collingwood Champion in our Early Years and Concert Years Divisions. This will be a must see event never offered before at the Collingwood Elvis Festival. Past Professional Champions are “invited†to participate but it is not “mandatory†involvement. Limited number of Professional competitor positions are available.
Competitors include Ray Guillemette, David Muggeridge, Thane Dunn, Chris Ayotte, Ben Klein, Shon Carroll, Matt King, Irv Cass, Jay Zanier. Additional competitors may be announced.
Saturday, July 24, 2010, 8pm – 11:30pm featuring our 2009 Champions Thane Dunn and Chris Ayotte, in addition to an impressive roster of other Collingwood Past Champions. An independent “one night only†head to head competition of our Professional Collingwood Champions to see who will reign the overall Collingwood Champion in our Early Years and Concert Years Divisions. This will be a must see event never offered before at the Collingwood Elvis Festival. Past Professional Champions are “invited†to participate but it is not “mandatory†involvement. Limited number of Professional competitor positions are available. Competitors include Ray Guillemette, David Muggeridge, Thane Dunn, Chris Ayotte, Ben Klein, Shon Carroll, Matt King, Irv Cass, Jay Zanier. Additional competitors may be announced.
“Only had one beer, Occiferâ€
“Only had one beer, Occiferâ€
A Polish great-grandmother is facing three years in jail for riding her bicycle drunk.
Keystyna Patycka of Kopacz was stopped by police for weaving from one side of the road to the other on her way to local shops, theRomanian Times reports.
The 75-year-old was immediately banned from riding her bike by officers after ignoring a series of private cautions. She now faces drinking and driving charges which could land her in jail for three years if found guilty.
Patycka said all she had to drink was “one bottle of beer …â€
Several times a day.
Keystyna Patycka of Kopacz was stopped by police for weaving from one side of the road to the other on her way to local shops, theRomanian Times reports.
The 75-year-old was immediately banned from riding her bike by officers after ignoring a series of private cautions. She now faces drinking and driving charges which could land her in jail for three years if found guilty.
Patycka said all she had to drink was “one bottle of beer …â€
Several times a day.
The Collingwood Elvis Festival 2010 is taking place from Thursday, July 22nd – Sunday, July 25th!
Make your way over to Collingwood for a fun filled four days of Elvis!
With over 100 Elvis Impersonators, it should be quiet a show!
Elvis Aaron Presley (January 8, 1935 – August 16, 1977) was one of the most popular American singers of the 20th century. A cultural icon, he is widely known by the single name Elvis. He is often referred to as the “King of Rock and Roll” or simply “the King”.
| Elvis Presley | |
|---|---|
Publicity photo for Jailhouse Rock (1957)
|
|
| Background information | |
| Birth name | Elvis Aaron Presley |
| Born | January 8, 1935 Tupelo, Mississippi, United States |
| Died | August 16, 1977 (aged 42) Memphis, Tennessee, United States |
| Genres | Rock and roll, pop, rockabilly,country, blues, gospel, R&B |
| Occupations | Musician, actor |
| Instruments | Vocals, guitar, piano |
| Years active | 1954–1977 |
| Labels | Sun, RCA Victor |
| Associated acts | The Blue Moon Boys, The Jordanaires |
| Website | www.elvis.com |
| Notable instruments | |
| Martin D-18, Gibson J-200 | |
A woman comes home and tells her husband, “Remember those headaches
I’ve been having all these years? Well, they’re gone.”
“No more headaches?”
The husband asks, ”What happened?”
His wife replies, Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to
stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat “I do not Have
a Headache; I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache..”
It Worked! The headaches are all gone.”
The husband replies, “Well, that is wonderful.”
His wife then says, “You know, you haven’t been exactly a ball of
Fire in the bedroom these last few years. Why don’t you go see the
Hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?”
The husband agrees to try it
Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his
clothes, picks up his wife and carries her into the bedroom.
He puts her on the bed and says, “Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”
He goes into the Bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and
jumps into bed and makes Passionate love to his wife like never
before.
His wife says, “Boy, that was wonderful!”
The husband says, “Don’t move! I will be right back.” He goes back
into the bathroom, Comes back and round two was even better than The
First time.
The wife sits up and her head is spinning.
Her husband again says, “Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”
With that, he goes back in the bathroom.
This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the Bathroom,
She sees him standing at the mirror and saying,
“She’s not my Wife.
She’s Not my wife.
She’s not my wife…”
and that’s when the fight started…
Trip to Costco
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for
my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a
woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had; an elephant? So since I’m retired and have little to
do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the
Purina Diet again.
I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last
time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or
two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works
well and I was going to try it again (I have to mention here that practically
everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.). Horrified, she asked if I
ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I
stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setters ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing
so hard.
Costco won’t let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people.. They have all the time in the world
to think of crazy things to say.
Avoiding excessive sun exposure can not only prevent serious heat-related illness such as sun stroke and heat exhaustion, it can also prevent sun damage and burns. Remember to:
– Schedule outdoor physical activities for when UV rays are at their weakest — before 10 a.m. and after 4 p.m.
– Generously apply a broad-spectrum sunscreen that protects against both UVA and UVB rays with a sun protection factor (SPF) of at least 30 to all exposed skin.
– Wear UVA/UVB protective sunglasses to prevent eye damage.
– Protect yourself even in cloudy or overcast weather as the sun’s rays can penetrate clouds.
– Drink plenty of fluids and avoid drinks that can lead to dehydration, such as alcohol and coffee
In order to avoid these burns:
Kim Kardashian – Bad Tan
From Wikipedia:
A sunburn is a burn to living tissue, such as skin, which is produced by overexposure to ultraviolet (UV) radiation, commonly from the sun‘s rays. Usual mild symptoms in humans and animals include red or reddish skin that is hot to the touch, general fatigue, and mild dizziness. An excess of UV radiation can be life-threatening in extreme cases. Exposure of the skin to lesser amounts of UV radiation will often produce a suntan.
Excessive UV radiation is the leading cause of primarily non-malignant skin tumors.[1][2] Sunscreen is widely agreed to prevent sunburn, although some scientists argue that it may not effectively protect against malignant melanoma, which is either caused by a different part of the ultraviolet spectrum or is not caused by sun exposure at all.[3][4] Clothing, including hats, is considered the preferred skin protection method. Moderate sun tanning without burning can also prevent subsequent sunburn, as it increases the amount of melanin, a skin photoprotectant pigment that is the skin’s natural defense against overexposure. Importantly, both sunburn and the increase in melanin production are triggered by direct DNA damage. When the skin cells’ DNA is damaged by UV radiation, type I cell-death is triggered and the skin is replaced.[5] Malignant melanoma may occur as a result of indirect DNA damage if the damage is not properly repaired. Proper repair occurs in the majority of DNA damage, and as a result not every exposure to UV results in cancer. The only cure for sunburn is slow healing, although some skin creams can help with the symptoms.
An elderly man finds he is unable to perform sexually. He finally goes to his doctor who tries a few things; but nothing seems to work. So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man.
The medicine man says, “I can cure this.” With that said, he throws a white powder in a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. Then he says, “This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say ‘123,’ and it shall rise for as long as you wish!”
The guy then asks, “What happens when it’s over, and I don’t want to continue?” The medicine man replies, “All you or your partner has to say is 1234, and it will go down. But be warned, it will not work again for another year.”
The old gent rushes home, anxious to try out his new powers and prowess. That night he is ready to surprise his wife. He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion and cologne. After he gets into bed and is lying next to her, he says, “123.”
Suddenly he has the most gigantic stiffie he has ever had, just as the medicine man had promised. His wife, who had been facing away from him,
turns over and asks, “What did you say 123 for?”
